[Testimony] Filling the hole in my heart

I am only 15. I attended Shine this year with my sister. When I first agreed to come, it was just an excuse to get out of the house. After the weekend was over, I wished I could do it all again! It was amazing!

You see, I have a bad past. I know what you’re thinking, she doesn’t have a bad past, she is only 15. Well, by the age of 15, I had already slept with over 100 men. Some of them even 25 years old when I was 12. My mom’s boyfriend sexually, physically, emotionally and verbally abused me until I was 13.

I lost my virginity at the age of 10. And I was very big into drugs, smoking and drinking.

By coming to Shine, I learned that I can not fill the hole in my heart with anything but God. And it’s true! God can do miracles.

I am trying to stop doing those thing. Please keep me in your prayers and I love you. God is amazing!

Posted on: June 17th, 2008

6 comments

  • 1. Jlenia
    Jun 28, 2008 at 10:36 am

    Hey girl, God bless! Let me tell you what I think about your story: no matter what you did, no matter what other people did to you, God is always there for you, every moment of your life, and whenever you need help you just have to call on Him and you will see how much peace and hope He will bring into your life. Girl, nobody is perfect, we are all sinners and we all know what it means to have a past life without God. But the good news is, whenever you let God take control over your life everything will change! Pray for deliverance, ask God help, ask Him to send into your life somebody to support you, join some group to serve in the church. (It is so much fun!) And be patient, let God work in your life. You are precious to God just like everybody else. The mistakes you made do not make God love you any less, He surely has a great plan for your life! Stay strong girl!

  • 2. Kathy Hand
    Jun 27, 2008 at 6:54 pm

    You are awesome! Always remember God is there for you no matter what! There is nothing you can do that would ever make him stop loving you. Just keep talking to Him and asking him to lead and guide you. I will continue to pray for you! I’m so proud of you!!

  • 3. Robin
    Jun 20, 2008 at 9:26 am

    What an amazing amount of courage you have! I am so glad that you chose to get out of the house and into GOD’s House for SHINE…It truly is not a “feel good” conference it really has the power to change lives…There were those @ SHINE who came seeking GOD and there were those who GOD was seeking and He would have come there just for YOU! GOD is the 1 person who will always be there for you and I pray you continue to grow in Him and lean on Him…With this blog you will have so many women praying for you that you will have the power to stop those things you mentioned…I have found that when we endure a trial, it becomes our testimony and we are able to help others in the future…You are truly inspiring to me and who knows, maybe we will see you @ SHINE ‘09…

  • 4. Sherry
    Jun 18, 2008 at 10:56 am

    Hi brave, beautiful young lady,
    Just wanted you to know, it is my privilege to add you to my prayers! You can do this; & we believe in you & love you.
    So glad you were able to come to SHINE - my 16 year old daughter loves it too!

  • 5. Kerri
    Jun 17, 2008 at 4:24 pm

    Hey beautiful girl! Just want you to know that you are loved and valued beyond measure and that there is a company of women in Jacksonville who believes in your potential. Hope you get the chance to read this. Love, Kerri

  • 6. Anonymous
    Jun 17, 2008 at 12:30 pm

    Oh my, who ever you are that sent this in, I commend you for being so open and honest. God is your Savior and each time your are presented with an opportunity to turn back from His saving grace, you have to remember how you felt at Shine. It’s those moments of love and peace and forgiveness that are going to help you turn your life around. I am so proud of you and find it very encouraging that you took advantage of the chance to get away from home and surround yourself with other women and God’s Holy Spirit.
    I believe it and claim that you can stop doing those things, you can turn from them and never look back. You are God’s precious daughter, His beautiful warrior and little girl. Cling to Him who saved your soul and watch as your life is transformed.

    Praise God for you and I lift you up in my prayers.

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